HOW DO YOU WANT TO RAISE YOUR CHILDREN?

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So this morning, I came to Huong Dong Que restaurant for breakfast with my mom and her friends. The food was okay, not so special, but I guess that was fair for the money we paid. So after everyone was full and could not eat anymore food, we started some small talk and as usual with old people, the topic would be about their children or grandchildren. Kids nowadays are so different from how we used to be. They are different from my generation, and even more different from my mom’s generation. That is pretty obvious since with the passing of time, life-style and living condition have changed considerably as well. However, from my own observation, I think the children most of the time resemble their parents. Well, maybe, but maybe not though. I am a lot like my mom, but my sister is quite different from me, so yeah, but still they say like father, like son…, family still has a big influence on shaping a child’s personalities and life’s perspective. That leads me to the question how I would like to raise my own children if I ever have one or more than one. This of course won’t depend on me alone, but also my husband, my family, and his family as well, but sill I wonder how should I educate my children, what will I tell them about life. Apparently, there are so many ways to live this life now, and there are so many events that can happen during your lifetime that you will have no control over at all. When I was young, I was taught that good things would come to good people, who were nice, selfless, honest, caring, and so on. Of course when I grow up, I understand it is not always the case now, especially in a country like VIetnam where all kinds of values are mixing up, and we are in the process of transitioning our economy to a market-based economy. People talk about money everywhere, and how money is important to our life. Older people try to somewhat keep the old way of controlling their children, while young people are craving for freedom to live their life as they please. Some people want to be rich and hold important positions in the society; some people want to find happiness in pursuing their passions, being a traveler, a writer, an artist; some people want a stable life, and a well-paying job; some want to just make it day by day and enjoying life. I think it is okay for me to choose a life for myself, but when it come to my other responsibilities as a child, as a parent, things get messy. You can not have it all, so there are things that I will have to give up…

But anyways, so when my children ask me about life, what should I tell them? Should I tell them the world is a wonderful place where everything is fair and safe and they can have faith in human beings; or should I tell them to be reserved and protect themselves from many unexpected  mishaps; should I tell them to be honest when so many dishonest people are rich and get things done the easy way; or should I just simply tell them to live, explore the world and have their own answer? I know I want them to be happy, to fall in love, to get the best of their life, but then, what do they expect from me? I think parents rarely ask that question themselves. They have expectations for their children but they never ask their children what do they want…

Anyways, just some thoughts I wanna share today, and I am curious as to what others may think about it 🙂

 

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